I slept in, not only that, i slept all the night through. I did awake a few times, established I was okay and went right back to sleep. It was raining and that was enough I think to keep the call of nature far far away.
I missed being there for the kids going into school, but as I wasn’t making much of an impact anyway, I decided it wasn’t a great loss, and after the days I had been having, the hour of extra sleep was understandable.
I drank my morning tea, which has been so wonderful to find outside the tent each morning. I met with Rev. Jane to remind her about the Standard reporter coming at 10:30a.m. And got my thermos of coffee.
With time to spare and the day being cold and drizzly, i popped over to the laundromat and threw my hoodie and jean jacket into the dryer and popped 20mins of quarters in. Made change for a gentleman who needed coins to do his laundry and the change machine was out. Having a lot of change comes in handy! I chatted for a while with the two people waiting for their laundry. I’m sure they could tell i wasn’t the average person doing their laundry, I just threw my outer clothing into a dryer! They didn’t ask any questions, and didn’t treat me any differently than how they treated each other and for that I was very thankful. The gentleman, when I finally found an electrical outlet said, “I guess you have to look for those everywhere you go if you don’t have electricity”. I just agreed with him, but inside i was glowing that I had been seen and accepted simply for being me.
10:30 arrived, back over the street i went to the tent and soon after, the reporter for the Standard arrived. Rev Jane came out and I was interviewed, some pretty tough questions, but mostly the usual ones. Rev Jane answered some as well and that was that. That interview was one we had to fight pretty hard for; seems everyone at Metroland/Torstar was off this week and this reporter came to us during his time off - but the story won’t be written or published until next week.
I’m gonna share here one of the the common questions from interviews, right from Day One… can I take a picture of the inside of your tent? I was so taken aback the first time this was asked and said no, and I have said no each time, but at this last request, I said, no, that’s my home, meaning it’s my personal space, no you can’t take a photo of that.
Well, that didn’t take long, so off to the Fleming Centre for the facilities and to get warm and dry… the reporters get to experience whatever weather I’m experiencing of course. I did my socials check, answered texts, checked in with mom and husband. Something most homeless people probably don’t have… connections to family and friends. It’s that connection I think, no, I know, that has kept me going - the congregation and Rev Jane, my mom and my husband, all giving me strength to see this through to the end.
I hung out at the Fleming Centre, scattered some flyers around, read a bit and then just as I was getting ready to sleep, it was time to go meet Sam on the church lawn. I had emailed out last night to many people in the congregation, hoping they could be there to support me and to ask Sam questions. I was pleased to get a text from Rev. Jane saying that there were people starting to gather! I asked everybody to wait inside until Sam and Mike came; but I have very stubborn supporters I think… if I was staying outside, they were staying outside. Looks like they might be taking my rules and using them against me. We had a good visit while we waited, and everyone got a chance to ask me questions. We laughed, I almost cried a few times - a woman gave me her “not gloves” I can’t begin to describe them, but you didn’t have to put your fingers into tight “fingers’, you pulled this “sock without toes” up and put whatever fingers you need at that time through the decorative laces. What a relief for my hands. When I put my gloves on they squeezed my very sore hands and made them hurt more. This new invention was amazing.
Anywho… I’m sidetracked! Sam and Mike arrived and Sam did what all politicians do, shook the hand of every person there. The visit when something like this… we questioned, Sam answered, we listened, we restated, he answered, we listened, we sighed, we tried again, we defended, he spoke, we listened, we thanked him, they left. He did say he would take whatever we wanted to send him; facts, videos, stories, ideas, proposals etc., and if he felt it was good/valid/worth it, he would take it to the correct Minister and Department. We asked that when he didn’t find it to be good/valid/worth it, that he tell us why. He agreed.
Before they left, I told Sam that the people who were there today to support me were a small sampling of our congregation and that the support we had was enough that were aren’t going to give up. We will see this to the end.
I was very thankful that Sam didn’t ask if he could see the inside of my tent. That might have required bail money.
I hugged my supporters, I gathered my stuff, and off I went, this time, off to Tim Hortons. Needed food, hot food. I hung out there for a while, then went back to the Fleming Centre. I had a visit there from a member of the congregation who pretty much demanded that I go home with her for supper. I stammered out the worst no with a very bad explanation as to why i just couldn’t do that! Leaving out the logistical reasons, even after she explained previously she had taken a homeless relative into her home for three years, I told her my soul couldn’t say yes, I couldn’t be with people right now for very long before getting edgy and anxious and the need to cry would be over powering - but I didn’t explain it like that, I just made a mess of the whole thing! She sat with me and she told me about her step-brother and we traded life stories and it was a great time getting to know someone I have been sitting on committees and in the church pews with - who I really didn’t know. I have a much better idea of who she is now and I wish I had taken the time earlier on in our history to get to know her, she is a wonderful woman and I would be pleased if she let me call her friend. I still said no when she again offered dinner, and a shower, and her couch!
I stayed there for a bit more before I decided it was time for dinner and I got myself off to the downtown area, and back to Conversations Cafe. Although I have been oh so lucky to receive what would be considered a good amount of money from supporters - including $5 found late last night in front of the tent - I want to be careful with how I spend it all. I know that at Conversations Cafe I can get a really good meal and tea (Decafe!) and I can sit there charging my devices, even after I finish eating and my teacup is empty. Unless they need the table, I’m good until 9pm.
Folks, it has been a long day. Thinking takes so much of energy. Thinking about answers to news reporters questions. Listening to Sam. Wondering about where to go this time to get warm. Wanting people to engage with me, but really struggling with being a human being considering the situation I am in, it is all very very exhausting. I haven’t felt this foggy since my dad died. I feel sometimes like I have a deep loss, a hole in my chest, a metallic feeling that something is missing. The same feeling when I cleaned out my dad’s long term care home room. The same feeling I got for months after when I thought of him, and sometimes still do. I have a good idea what he would have said about this project… i think he would be proud, but he would want to join the Band-of-Silver-Haired-Ladies who threatened to park their cars near the tent every night.
The people who check in on me every day, offering food, drinks, money, warm homes and words of support, you are amazing, and it is because of you that I am still here, and that is a good thing.
I will pack up my stuff into my backpack shortly, go back to the tent and make my bed, crawl in and go to sleep. Tomorrow is my last day and I feel like it might be the longest and hardest. I don’t have any challenges or adventures planned. Just find food, keep warm and start packing. Sometime tomorrow evening I go home. Then Sunday, back for church and then to pack up the tent and tarps. You are most certainly invited to attend our service, everyone is welcome. Or, tune in to our YouTube for a live stream of the service or catch it later… start at Trinitybeamsville.ca and follow the links.
Bye for now
, you are an inspiration , hopefully change and action is forthcoming
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